samuyed:

volskaya-shitdustries:

iminlovewithmyshotguns:

superrisu:

When you use your talent for evil…

(Based off this video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHmBf4ExtZk )


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Ok what

i just watched the music video and cried

what has the world come to

@plasmarifles

chenkin-nuggets:

ahhh yes I love my Overwatch ships like Reaper76, Zarymei, Widowtracer, and–

*looks at smudged handwriting*

mcdonalds

ohhowlucky:

danteogodofsoup:

killbenedictcumberbatch:

standupcomedyblog:

John Mulaney | The Salt & Pepper Diner

THE BEST JOKE IN EXISTENCE

GOD I JUST TOLD SOMEONE ABOUT THIS STORY

This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.

animmalcrossing:

airport staff: sir, do you have anything to declare today?

me: *starts sweating* uh no.. *trips and falls* *hundreds of Kinder surprise eggs roll out of my pockets, jacket and briefcase*

airport staff: GET ON THE GROUND NOW

me: but i am

*armed guards swarm round and pin me down*

armed guards: WHAT’S IN THE EGGS?

me: i dont know its a surprise!! 

psijii:

“ why don’t you talk about yourself more? open up ! “

dhkinkmeme:

The Outsider gives Corvo the power to make void tentacles and gets enthusiastically fucked by them as Corvo tries them out

nsfw under the cut!

Keep reading

piperandblue:

but honestly

surprisebitch:

ohmitsalex:

I love when everything comes together

LOL

3xquisitely:

traitor:

poky:

virguin:

pixyled:

and-down-we-go:

My Mom just accidentally prematurely sent an email to an accounting firm… It was supposed to say ‘I am afraid that we will have to postpone our meeting”

but she hit send when all it said was

Hi Jeffrey,
      I am afraid

THIS POS T GETS ME EVEYRTIME

prometheus023:

elfied:

aicosu:

AHHAHAHHAHAHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHH MY GOD

AMAZING

“You sent me here on purpose, you knew exactly what you were doing”

far-too-fnaf:

OH MY GOD F*CK QUEUEING THIS IS MY AU 

flustered-custard:

please watch this vine

yeah-i-capiche:

what am I doing with my free time?